My Due Date

Hard to believe that TODAY was the day I thought I would give birth. Another of many lessons in life and it not always going the way you would think. It is crazy how fast the whole experience has gone. I remember it like it was yesterday, finding out we were pregnant, telling everyone, getting the room ready and then all of a sudden we were in the hospital and Connor Francis Johnson arrived six weeks early. It is just wild that instead of spending today possibly in labor, I am spending it with my nearly six week old baby boy. Even after all the tears and fear during out two month stay in the hospital, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I love my little boy and our expanded family more than anything in the world.
We were laying in bed this morning (Bj laying down, me next to him, Connor asleep on my chest, the dogs flanking either side) and Bj looks over at me and says, "this is it, isn't it?" I couldn't help but smile as I looked at him and said, "yes...this is it, just the way it should be."

Visitors!

We were spoiled yet again this weekend with Aunt Steph, Aunt Jen and Ashley's visit this past weekend! We were so excited to see them and I think they were pretty excited to meet Connor Man! I am pretty sure he charmed both of them -- Aunt Jen almost took him home in her suitcase!

We had such a wonderful time hanging out, eating, holding the little guy and shopping! Aunt Steph and I snuck away on Saturday and did some shopping (shocking and hard to believe, I know!) and got some great deals on cute clothes for Connor and Baby K. I think between the two of them, they already have more clothes than we do! They are going to be two stylish babies, I know that for sure! Jen, Ashley and Brian went to dinner at Bj's and some perusing on Pearl Street while Steph and I hung out with Connor. It was really nice! I had a little time with Steph and I and a little time with Jen and the family! It was perfect and couldn't have worked out better. We took about 400 pictures -- another huge surprise! Connor wrote Aunt Jen a note saying how much he loves her and asking if she would be his godmother! She accepted and now the little guy has Uncle Dave as a godfather and Aunt Jen as a godmother. He is awfully lucky if you ask me!

Connor was great! I don't think his back touched anything but the back of someones arms the whole time they were here. He loves to snuggle and it was so nice to have a few extra sets of hands to snuggle him with. I think he only kept them up a little bit in the middle of the night too, so that was good! Poor Steph came in to snuggle with us after Bj went to work on Friday and saw me standing over Connor's bassinet in a t-shirt and crazy hair -- going "my boobs hurt and I am really tired..." she took one look at me and offered to feed Connor while I slept for a few more minutes. It was awfully sweet of her, I told her we were breaking her in for Baby K! The little bugster likes to sleep by day, party by night these days :) Now that we are visitor-less we are just hanging out, getting the house back together. We are looking forward to our next visit from Granny and the Danieley L 103 reunion!!

And now, the pictures from the weekend!

That is the update from our weekend, as you can tell we all had a great time! Thanks Auntie's!

One Month Stats

I forgot to include this in the last post...

We went to the doctor for Connor's one month check-up and here are his "stats"...

Weight: 5lb. 90z.

Length: 18.5in.

Everything looks great! He is gaining weight just the way he should and we are so proud of him! He has finally learned to eat like his momma it looks like! Way to go little man!

One Month Old!

It is hard to believe, but the little guy hit the one month mark on January 17th! It seems like just yesterday we found out we were pregnant and were in the hospital listening to the Annie and Frankie mix "Godspeed" (oh yeah it doesn't make me cry at all every time I listen to it!) on the day the little man decided to arrive, and now he is one month old! We had to celebrate the day, he slept through most of it, but I thoroughly enjoyed the excuse to make a cake and use my new Pampered Chef Icing tools! I don't think they are going to be calling me anytime to work as a demonstrator, but I had fun!
He is pretty wonderful and we love him dearly! So far we have found that he has a big personality, likes to have his hands at his face at all times and works ferociously to get them out of the bottom of the "papoose" daddy wraps him in! He loves his swing and snuggling, he also enjoys sleeping during the daylight hours and "partying" during the late night hours. He has already peed in his hair, all the way over the changing table to the couch, and enjoys riding in the car. He is beautiful, he grabs your hand when he eats and watches everything that is going on. He tracks us with his eyes and is the best little baby out there. He grunts, stretches and toots a lot. He has already earned the nicknames: Stretch, Stinky Pete, One Eyed Willy (when he is too tired to keep both eyes open he likes to keep tabs on things with the one eye), Sweet Boy, Little Guy and Sweet Man. We can't wait to see what changes he makes in the next month!
Happy One Month Little Man -- It's been the best month of our lives!

Home Sweet Home

We didn't know if it was ever going to happen, but we finally busted Connor Francis Johnson out of the hospital and brought him home. It only took exactly 8 weeks, but on Thursday January 15th we made it home, right where we should be. For those of you who know my superstitious ways you will appreciate that I waited until Thursday morning and double checked with the doctor to make sure before I started packing anything up! I couldn't help myself, I was taking no chances. As soon as we realized they were letting us leave the whole experience seemed like it flew by. All of a sudden we felt like a normal couple who had just had a baby, we got to hold him with my wires, in our room!

We think the little guy is going to like it here. The doggies have already acquainted themselves with him and sniffed every inch of him. When he cries they look at us like our baby is crying would one of you please tend to him. Life is good and that is about it. We are just enjoying our time together with out sweet little family! Here a few shots from the first day...

I mean...the scary part is that I only posted a handful of the first day shots! Enjoy!

The Johnson's Come to Visit!

On Wednesday the 14th, Nana and Grandpa ("Sir") Johnson came to visit the "little guy". We were so excited to see them and so happy to show off the little man! They came to the hospital right after making a pit stop at Sam's and they were pretty excited to meet Connor in the flesh. After saying hi, we snuck out to have some dinner and talk about how excited to were to bring the little man home on THURSDAY!!! We were given the go-ahead to bust the little man out and we couldn't be happier. More on that later though...

We spent a wonderful weekend relaxing at the house. It was so nice to have two extra sets of hands to help cook, clean, hold the baby, put together the play-pen and swing and give Momma some time to organize the house! I was able to get the nursery together and were snuck out to make some Babies R Us returns. Connor was spoiled rotten and we were so happy to have them here with us. We were so sad to see them leave on Sunday. We think they are pretty smitten and can't wait to see the little man when we head to St. Louis in February! Here are some highlights from the weekend...

Car Seat Check...

Once the feeding tube and oxygen tube came out and Connor was "wireless" we started thinking (on direction of the doctor) in the direction of actually being released from the hospital! The thought of breaking out was so exciting, but we were prepared to be patient and wait until the Connor man was ready. Bj and I left to grab some dinner on Monday night and when we left the nurse said she was going to put Connor in his car seat for is car seat challenge. He had to be able to sit in the car seat for an hour and not drop any of his stats or stop breathing. He did great, yet another hurdle he has conquered. He looked adorable in his car seat, just so small!

Doesn't that look like the face of a little boy who wants to go home with his momma and daddy?!

Look Momma and Daddy -- No Feeding Tube!

That's right -- a very handsome 5 POUND baby boy got his feeding tube pulled this morning! He is such a big boy -- eating all of his food from the boob or the bottle! He is a bit of a booby man and does really well breastfeeding. In the last few days he has also become quite the little bottle feeder. We will let him go with the bottle, anything to get us out of here a little faster. He has also been a rock star and gaining weight like his momma the last few days. Since last Wednesday night he has gained at least an ounce every day and last night he gained 2.8 ounces and now weighs 5 pounds! We can't quite believe it and we know officially don't have to buy him a new car seat! We talked to Bill the Car Seat Guy right after he was born, proudly told him Connor weighed 4lb. 2oz. and he said well, he can't ride in that particular car seat until he reaches 5lbs. So, way to go champ, you will fit in your car seat! As I type, the little guy his working on a room air challenge to see if he can lose his oxygen. We don't know what we are going to do when he has no tubes or stickers on his little face! That is all the buzz around here -- other than that we are getting ready for the Johnson's visit tomorrow!! We can't wait to see them and introduce them to Connor man!

Just Because...

he is cute. Really, really cute. AND I have turned into that momma -- people will say "oh he is so cute" and instead of saying thank you, I usually go "i know, isn't he cute, isn't he funny?! we really like him!!". It makes me chuckle just a little bit. We are just totally in love, I really don't know what else to say. You know you love someone when your aunt comes to visit and we nickname him "Stinky Pete" because oh boy is he a stinky little man (takes after daddy I think) and you find it cute and endearing! Yesterday Bj and I were getting him ready to eat, this process involves changing his diaper, we kept lifting his legs up and every time we did he would fart. We could not contain ourselves, I think you could hear of laughing down the hall. He must have done it about

Auntie Comes to Visit!

We were so excited for Auntie's arrival yesterday! She got in about 9:00 and we can straight to the hospital so she could meet the little man. I think she is pretty smitten! We snuck out of the hospital to grab some lunch at Bj's and walk up and down the Pearl Street Mall. It was nice to get out and about and show her where we live. After that it was back to the hospital to hang out with Connor man. We are going to tour around a little tomorrow and just hang out the rest of the weekend.

It is so nice having her around -- we wish she could stay for a few more weeks! Bj is heading up to the mountains tomorrow morning and Auntie and I are looking forward to hanging out for a little gal's time with the babe!

Mr. March

I know it is a little early for St. Patrick's day, but we thought Connor needed to pose for his March calendar page a little early this year -- in his kilt from Uncle Davey. Now this is not just any kilt you see, it is a coozy kilt meant to go around your beer. Instead it went around the waist of our tiny infant!! We were crying as usual because come on the little guy is not big enough for a real kilt so Uncle Davey ordered him one that is meant to go around your beer can! I think we are going to have to save it for him as a present on his 21st birthday and we can tell him that is the very same one he wore in the NICU! Uncle Dave kept saying the description should read "to adorn your average beer can or premature infant!" We got a pretty big kick out of it!

We kind of can't contain ourselves when it comes to dressing the little man up -- he is so little, how can one resist?! He was far less excited about this one than the stocking pictures, but he still looks pretty darn cute! I can't help but love the little chicken legs sticking out from underneath the kilt -- a little too cute for me to handle! He was a little fussy after the photo shoot and I just HAD to hold him for an hour afterwards to calm him down :) You know, because I really minded! Ha! I could hold the little man all day long and just for the record, he already has us wrapped around his sweet little fingers!

4 Years

Four years ago today we lost a huge part of our Lawton family dynamic. It was a devastating shock, one that I don't think we will ever truly get over. You get on with your life and everything is okay, but you never stop thinking about the person you lost and you never forget them. The anniversaries have slowly gotten a little easier to handle and I have to say that it was really nice this year to be able to think about some memories and whisper them to Connor while he was eating. I will talk more about those in just a moment.

We had a tough day yesterday at the hospital -- everything is fine, just a day of worrying over some tests -- but it really made me realize how much I appreciate the people in my life. My mom is the most amazing person I have ever met and I really don't think I will ever meet anyone else quite like her. She is so strong and amazing and takes everything in stride. I would not be the person I am today without her and she is always the first person I call when I am upset or have exciting news to share. After Connor was born I really could only make one phone call (I needed to be good so that I could be wheeled in to see the little man) and I couldn't wait to call my mom and tell her that she was a grandma to the most beautiful baby boy I had ever seen. She was so excited and I just couldn't wait for her to get here to see him. My brother is also quite amazing. He is Connor's godfather and I truly could not think of anyone I would trust more. He is going to teach him so many things and be a person he can look to for advice when he doesn't feel comfortable talking to boring old momma and daddy. He is the best brother I could ever ask for and has been a rock for me to lean on when I needed it and constant entertainment when the time calls for it. One of the best memories I have is he and George tearing it up at our wedding -- it makes me happy just thinking about it. In these four years since my dad has left us, I have added two more people to our little family, Bj and Connor. I think its pretty obvious, but I think Bj is the most wonderful husband and father out there. He makes me laugh and smile and I love any situations and memories I have to share with him. He takes care of me and makes me happy. I couldn't ask for anything more. I can't wait to grow old with him and see where the adventures of parenthood take us in the future. Connor, our newest addition, is simply amazing. I still can't quite believe that we created him -- he is perfect in every way. I know we all just can't wait to watch him grow into a sweet little boy, toddler, teenager and man. It is going to be an amazing journey. He has my dad's middle name and I know that he will be watching over him and taking care of him.

I was talking to Connor while I fed him today and I was telling him some of the things I miss about my dad. As I am now a momma with a little baby, I have been singing "Rock A Bye Baby" to Connor and it made me think of all the times my dad sang it to me. I can remember him rocking me and thinking I was asleep, putting me down, only to have me make up to hear it just one more time. I miss calling my mom at work and pretending to be different people -- she would play along though she always knew it was us. I miss our lunch dates -- we had quite a few and I really miss that time with him. Overall, I just miss him -- his laugh, his smile, his love of music and his family. I can't wait to tell Connor all about him. He was a wonderful dad and I miss him everyday...I love you pops!

3 Weeks Old!

It is still pretty hard to believe that instead of being three weeks away from my due date, I have a three week old son! I know we will get used to it, I think it will just make it more real when we are able to take the little man home!

He is doing really well! He has been put on a 26 calorie diet and another concentrate has been added to his food in an effort to beef him up! He has been doing great, he has gained at least one ounce (sometimes more!) for the last four days. He is now up to 4lbs 9oz -- doing so great! He has been doing awesome with his feedings too! He has even started taking full bottles, he is so big we can't stand it! He has become a little feisty the last few days and one of his favorite pastimes is grabbing on his oxygen tubes and yanking them out of his nose. He prefers to "oxygenate his eyeballs" as the nurses say or just wear the nasal cannula above his nose, below his nose or both in one nostril. We figure why not, he must know when he needs it and when he doesn't. I must say I prefer him pulling on that instead of his feeding tube. Apparently he and the little boy across the hall had a contest to see who could pull it out -- I think Connor lost, he only got his half way out. That is all the excitement that we have going on here. We are just anxiously awaiting the arrival of all of our guests this month -- Uncle Dave today, Auntie, The Johnson's, Jennifer, Steph and Granny! We are going to stay nice and busy and we like it that way! Daddy started his vacation yesterday and it has been really nice having him around. We are getting quite comfortable holed up at the hospital these days! We laugh, if only we could bring Scout and Sedona we would be set! Here are a few pictures from today!

This last picture is important because it is the face of a very clean little baby in a milk slumber after finishing his whole bottle! Way to go Connor -- we are so proud of you! Keep up the good work and we will be home in no time!

Below is a little video of Connor man as he was snoozing after lunch today. He just looked to sweet and peaceful as he was dreaming away. You can see him doing one of his favorite things -- pulling on his oxygen tube and or feeding tube. Last night he was so hungry he was trying to eat his hand, the oxygen tube and my boob :) Enjoy!

Sweet Dreams...

Things Momma Has Never Heard...

"You are falling off the charts in the weight department and we need to fatten you up. Let's bump up your calorie intake..."

Yep, one of those things I have never and probably will never hear from a doctor! But, can you guess what cute little man has heard it from his doctors?! That's right, Connor Francis Johnson is not even in the 10th percentile when it comes to weight and now needs 26 extra calories added to his food per ounce and all the fatty breast milk momma can produce (commonly referred to as "hind milk" for those of you wondering!) I just got a kick out of it...I wish we could switch metabolism's, I would happily give him mine and take his in exchange! Other than needing to beef up a little bit he is doing wonderful. Just hanging out growing, sleeping and eating -- all those things a little baby should. He is just perfect and we love all 4lb. 8oz. of him! Some shots of him snoozing away in momma's lap while he is eating...sweet little guy, he looks so cozy!

Little Bear

Many of you may know that I love nicknames (and knowing people's middle names, but that is neither here nor there) and pretty much if I say your name often don't be surprised if I change it or rearrange or add something to it. I even thought about nicknames when it came to naming Connor...who does that?!

Well, I have found myself calling Connor man "little bear" -- it just came our of nowhere but anytime I stumble into the little guys room, I nine times out of ten call him "little bear". It finally occurred to me when one of the doctors asked if she could come in and check him out even though he was sleeping and I replied "sure, but he might growl at you". It clicked -- he growls like a little bear sometimes! It's pretty cute in my opinion (and I like to think the opinion of others) but I also find it pretty funny! He is very expressive and talkative (already taking after him momma -- heaven help all of us if he is as sensitive, emotional and as talkative as his momma!!) and when he is woken from his slumber he tends to growl a little bit, also when he stretches out. Connor also has lots of different faces -- sometimes he looks worried, deep in thought, and happy. He likes to smile, (I think it might be gas -- he is kind of a stinky man) but he likes to smile at us and whatever it is, it looks like a smile and I will take it! He is just a really sweet little man and I do love watching him "be" everyday! We can't wait for the day we can take him home and show him all of the exciting things at home -- especially his big brother and sister! So, in honor of the nickname we took a picture of him with his own little bear!

We have started taking pictures of Connor next to his bear (a sweet gift from Rob and Mary!) so we can track just how much he is growing, we thought it would be kind of a fun thing to look back on and a great way to how much progress the little guy is making in the growing department!